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A Blue Heart-Break Moon

It is becoming increasingly clear to me that no two moments are alike; that at each moment there is an interplay of possibilities converging to create a space for something to happen.  I really experience this Full Moon of May 2016 drew near. It is one of this years Blue Moons.  For me it is showing up as a Blue Heart-Break Moon.

Blue Moon is a common term given to the second full moon in a calendar month.  Although tonights full moon is the only one in May 2016, it is still considered a Blue.  Why?  Because most seasons have three full moons in its cycle.  When a season has four, the third is called the Blue Moon.

I tend to begin experiencing the frequencies of the coming full moon about three days before its fullness.  This month, excruciating pain and grief showed up for me to look at.  Pain over not feeling loved by my mother.  Pain over my older sister disowning me.  Pain over not feeling seen and valued in my relationship.  Pain over feeling disconnected and lonely.  Pain over the shame that this is so after so many years of transformational work.  But this time my relationship with the pain is different. It feels like it is the first time I am allowing myself to really sit in the shadow of the pain and wait for the light of my becoming to emerge.

I have been writing about the New Earth Ascension Frequencies that are coming fast and furious to us; and how they are producing a huge amount of dross and karmic debris.   The pain I am and have been experiencing is so intense, at times I didn’t think I could bare it.  All I could manage to do is what is the feminine knows instinctively to do and that is to create the space for something new to emerge and take a deep dive into the shadow.

The lyrics of the famous song, Blue Moon, are washing over me  as I sing it to myself and for myself and stand naked and vulnerable in its light;  claiming what has been either lost or forgotten of me.  For I know that each pain story is returning to me with a message from my future and evolutionary self.  In them are hidden clues, in the form of gems, pointing me in the direction of my becoming.  They inform me that, yes, I am on purpose and on my path.  And yes, the dawn will come.  And yes, it will bring great change.

Loving you, under the same Blue Moon, I remain yours,


Blue Moon, you saw me standing alone
Without a dream in my heart
Without a love of my own

Blue Moon, you knew just what I was there for
You heard me saying a prayer for
Someone I really could care for

And then there suddenly appeared before me
The only one my arms will ever hold
I heard somebody whisper, ‘Please adore me’
And when I looked, the moon had turned to gold

Blue Moon, now I’m no longer alone
Without a dream in my heart
Without a love of my own

blue moon and woman




  1. Deirdre

    May 21, 2016 - 7:42 pm

    Wow! I also feel the pain of this full moon. Blue heart break moon sounds right to me. Time to acknowledge the pain and release it. I’m ready for new dawn. Thanks for sharing, Alison. I love you!

    • Alison McLean

      May 21, 2016 - 8:02 pm

      How blessed I am to journey with a sister of my blood and of my heart! Thank you for continually meeting me along the way. I love you too, Deirdre!

  2. Madhu

    September 29, 2016 - 7:26 pm

    Your words are like an echo from the past as I remember that full moon and feeling the grief of what seemed like my whole life. Thank you for sharing. These moments can be so isolating, to hear others experience helps to ground us in the inevitable change towards self realisation. Being and accepting natures order brings such wholeness to our being even during the “bad” times of which there really is no such thing. it is simply growth through change….easy to say

    • Alison McLean

      October 31, 2016 - 2:07 pm

      Hello Madhu, I was traveling when you posted your response and today is my first opportunity to respond. And what an auspicious day…Samhain…the day we cycle into darkness. I am feeling the pull inward and also again “feeling the grief that feels like my whole life”. I will use that one, my dear, with love and gratitude as that is the truth of it for me. There are times that it feels like a blanket of grief is covering me and always has and in this moment I know there is nothing wrong with that. I actually and experiencing the joy of life, of living, and of presence along with it. Thinking of you today. Love, Alison

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